I wonder if you even looked at me when you saw me. Did you even think about me or was I just another person who didn't matter in the back of your mind? Did you used to like me or do you still? Did you even like me in the first place? Or am I just too unbearably ugly for you or anyone else to like? I wish I knew but I'll never know.
But just so you know (in case you're reading this, which you're probably not) I really like you. And what's worse is I don't even talk to you. I base it all on the memories from the past. I wouldn't call it love, but it's stronger than a crush and I wish I could tell you everything, but I can't. And maybe I'm really weird for thinking this but I think about the things we would do if you were actually my boyfriend. I think about cuddling with you in bed and just listening to music or slow dancing listening to norah jones or a bajillion other things, but the amount of these things that will actually happen is zero. There's not a chance that I will have any experiences with you. I won't have my first kiss with you, or get to hold hands with you, which would be the first guy I would get to hold hands with. None. And what's worse? I know I need to stop thinking about you because I know I'll never be with you but I can't. So from here, I shall be deprived some more from the life I wish I could have with you.
